Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The OPM Of The Masses

Here comes the metal meltdown, run for your lives
Can’t stop the metal meltdown, no one survives

-“Metal Meltdown”, Judas Priest (Painkiller, 1990)

“Mine truly” are probably tired of me bashing hassidim and kollel yungerleit for living at taxpayers’ expense. Indeed, on a national scale, they are but the tiniest drop in a bottomless ocean. This is not an excuse, but for today we’ll focus on the ocean and leave the tiny drop alone.

Many are very angry –and rightly so- about the government’s $700 billion bailout of Wall Street gangsters, forgetting that the Government and Wall Street are practically one entity.

Time and again I am amazed at the efficiency of the age-old “boiling frog” method. For decades the government has been doing the same exact thing – only on a smaller scale – and no one utters as much as a krechtz. Millions of senseless institutions, governmental agencies, “non-profit” organizations, NGO’s and scores of other ponzi schemes are siphoning trillions out of our pockets with every tick of the clock. Yet, because there are no fearsome headlines about the involved sums' grand total, we go on as if nothing happened.

My friends, we have paid hundreds of times more than 700 billion over the past few decades. I’ll just give you one tiny little real-life example, with which I am familiar. A certain non-profit healthcare organization has about 6000 patients, serviced by over 3000 employees. A for-profit company of similar dimensions has only 2000 employees. The non-profit org’s CEO “makes” $700K a year, the for-profit’s 300. In the non-profit org there are countless bogus departments with bogus directors, all making nice six digit salaries, and do practically nothing. Of course, affirmative action quotas must be filled, and many departments need another sleazeball to reap your tax dollar. Of course, these important people have important meetings with lavish banquets, and if they go off budget, heck, Uncle Sam is but a phone call away. The for-profit org is not clean as a whistle either, but costs you much less, and patients aren’t treated any worse.
What goes on in universities and the education system is even worse. And let’s not forget the military and its sister industries – if anyone were to poke that with a ten foot pole, they’d be up their elbows in maggots.

Now multiply the above sketch by millions – school districts, child therapies, all the goodies supplied by local authorities, courts, different regulatory agencies, the luxuries you pay for prisoners, illegal immigrants and politicians. Yeah, Other People's Money... Sweet...

However, when there isn’t such a big fat frightening figure in the headlines, we’re more willing to pay. And let’s be honest, we usually successfully fool ourselves into believing that for better or worse, we do get some benefit out of the “services”. But not this time. This time it strikes us all: why should we bail out Paulson and Bernanke’s billionnnaire butts because of their own frauds? Either goyim are just unfamiliar with the phenomenon of pamphlets begging you to save this or that yungerman’s life, signed by sixty-six rabbis, all more prominent than thou, each promising you a different and more effective yeshuah for your buck – or… or they just don’t like the idea of being forced to pay for Wall Street’s magic carpet ride.

But in reality, we only get what we paid for. In truth, we’re all Wall Street, and we’re angry at Paulson, Bernanke and Congress only because they “outcrooked” us. Most of America live on Credit Card debt (i.e. those who don’t live off Mediacid, section 8 and foodstamps, or bogus tax-funded jobs etc.) in houses they can’t afford, eating food they don’t own and sleeping on beds they didn’t work for. Few are those who are really “neheneh miyegia capam” – and for the most, they don’t live large. Heck, most people even invest money they never had... in Wall Street!
And now, as the big snakes fear for their skins, they scornfully hiss at the little worms: “you must bail us out – or else we won’t bail you out”!

A long time ago, tavarish Lenin declared that religion is the opium of the masses.

And we almost agree with him;

OPM is the religion of the masses!

© Joseph Izrael 2008

Saturday, September 06, 2008


The heavy truck slowly trudged its way up the narrow, tortuous alleys of this once serene village now turned slum. The flow of curses and obscenities, in sharp contrast, spurt forth rapidly, smoothly, easily from the driver’s mouth, and seemed never to end. What upset the orator was not the fact that this beautiful place was turned into a dump, however.
“It’s all because of those conservative morons”, I observed. This had such a shocking effect that driver and truck alike came to a brisk halt – mid word. “Why?” was the only thing the poor trucker was able to say, still quite dizzy from getting such an illogical reaction. “Why? ‘Coz ‘em evangelists keep screamin’ against abortion, so this is what you get”. Nasty Jewboy was playin tricks with this hard workin’ kid’s head.

The source of his anger was the sight of human females in their early teens walking down the street with four to eight cubs hanging all around then – probably all from different fathers, yet not one in sight. To these little humanoids who will never have a loving family, a father, an education, it doesn’t matter whether life starts at conception, insemination, birth, or any other point in their evolution. They came to life for the sole reason that Broddah wanna knock up Sistah, and Sistah need cash. Now if life is so easily given, why fuss so much over taking it? In the name of sanctity of life mass-murderers, monsters who kill babies on their mothers’ arms, are given VIP treatment, the second amendment is constantly under fire, and there are angry protests whenever serial rapists-murderers are executed. But I see nothing sacred in the result of three minutes’ worth of smut in PS 101’s lavatory.

The book freakonomics demonstrates data showing that abortion reduces crime, as many of the aborted would live under conditions that produce criminals. The conclusion, however, is that abortion as a crime-fighting tool is extremely ineffective. The authors conveniently forget that the survey was conducted in a purely mathematical fashion, combining dry data from totally different countries (many Eastern European countries were included), and blind to societal differences. The fact on the ground is that abortions are performed by girls who want to “advance” in society, and who view an unwanted child as an inconvenience. But in communities where having children before puberty is the norm, and raising them is not expected, no one bothers to have an abortion. Incidentally, these are the communities with the highest crime rates. What a shockingly incredible coincidence! Probably has to do with global warming or atmospheric pressure…

Yasser Arafat proclaimed that Israel will be (or was?) defeated not by the Arab men and their weapons, nor by the bombs – but by the Arab women’s wombs. And many other leaders understand this all too well. Western man has grown too selfish to reproduce – he wants all the crackerjacks and adult movies for himself. But the NAACP knows that single mom benefits and pushing promiscuity results in a large, impoverished, ignorant and excitable base that is sure to keep them in power. Needless to say, the bill is footed by you, dear reader.

Hassidic leaders aren’t too far behind Messrs. Sharpton and Jackson. Any and all forms of contraception is forbidden in most cases, and of course any and all abortions are out of the question.*

But we’re living in tough times, and all the governmental freebie programs aren’t enough to cover the expenses of a poor hassidic family with twelve children, all in private schools, clad in fancy designer clothes – renewed quarterly, not to mention the Suburbans, Lexuses and beautiful (=grotesque, in hassidspeak) 5000sf homes. So totty and mommy are busy thinking up new schemes and themes for a quicker buck, and don’t have that much time to give Yoilish and Chaim Yitzchock and Shpritze Fraidel the education prescribed by Chaza”l. So what we end up with is the next generation of empty-headed hassid robots who can talk a real cool Yiddish, have their pajes curled really cleverly, don the latest in bekitsche fashion, and understand all the pictures in the dirty magazines.
But I’m not so sure they know –or care- the first thing about Pirkei Avos.

The Chofetz Chaim refused to give brochos for children, claiming they are a pikadon from Hashem, and that people do not keep this pikadon properly. “Sanctity of Life” is not a concept for the radical left to toy around with. It includes many things, including the elimination of evil from our midst by means of the death penalty, despite our inherent limits and faults as men.
And it also includes refraining from flinging life left and right irresponsibly. Men must not be used for “parentches fodder” and the fattening of some corrupt rebbe.

I’m not advocating mass abortions or even uncontrolled contraception. But do we really need all those hassidlings roam our streets with an empty gaze, a haggard daze?

*In New Square, this applies to all cases – no exceptions. Even parents who are known as genetic mismatches are forced by the Rebbe to refrain from contraception. The babies, of course, are to be abandoned in the hospital, as mentally retarded children “disrupt the functioning of a hassidic family”. However, adopting such a child (which incidentally comes with a nice compensation package from the government (i.e. taxpayer) is encouraged. That does not disrupt the serenity of the hassidic family)

© Joseph Izrael 2008