You Don’t Have To Be Old To Be Wise

Sometimes one can see a silver lining to a very dark cloud.
It is heartwarming to see how organizations that are at odds with one another – and quite often at each other’s throats (preferably about petty quibbles and power plays) unite in times of dire to help the clal.
So you can imagine how warm my blackened heart felt when I saw the posters of the Parnassa intitative in shul, outlining their different ways to help in difficult times.

Isn’t it great that our leaders take the time and effort to help with employment and business initiatives? And even able to put aside their ideological wars for a while to mend our scars?

Unfortunately, it only happens after the fact. How long have I been screaming about leaders ignoring the impending fiscal dangers? Why was everyone silent about abusing the system, hiring illegal aliens and living an irresponsible lifestyle of drunken sailors?
Not one poster, not one word, not one warning, and of course, chas vesholem, no union of JWF (Jewish Warring Factions) to asser –or at least warn- about the housing scam. No. The venerable rabbis sat idle as they got fat on donations from real-estate scammers. No one cared that the house of cards was bound to collapse. Not one suggested that Jewish businesses employ Jewish people to do the menial jobs – no Parnossah fund was established to fill the gap between what American workers ask and what employers pay to illegal immigrants.

But thankfully the satellite circus just rolled into town. The Council Of The Sages Of Chelm have united to help you: free gmachs to start a business – the way to help us out of the hailed “economic crisis”! That’s right raboisai, now that the water’s overhead, the free loan fund will bail out the freeloaders, and the business loan initiative will give 5 grand to those who have enough dishonest friends to co-sign the loan.
I just keep wondering, how these clairvoyants invariably fail to see what’s coming, and refuse to act before it’s too late? Are our wise rabbis in lockstep with the lowliest of politicians, or is it vice versa? So here you have it, the frum version of Obama’s Stalinist payback-ransack bill. And the same old usurpation of Jews’ love of hessed to benefit ganefs who will be the only ones to benefit from the Parnossah initiative.

If the “עיני העדה” are themselves blind, why do they have to be followed?
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Since I don’t want to be only negative, I have a few real suggestions to ease the burden & the hurt of the economic crisis:

Entice real estate owners to let people live in their houses for very cheap. There are hundreds upon hundreds of houses standing empty for over two years, yet the prices are not going down. Why? Because the owners know that their politicians will prevent the properties from being confiscated. The real estate gangs stick together to keep prices inflated. The rabbis know, but they need to make a living, too. Tell them to sell the houses at low prices instead of taxpayers having to bail them out.

Second: publish a kol korei signed by the biggest rabbis unequivocally prohibiting the hiring of illegal immigrants. Let frum people pack orders at Kosher supermarkets, and establish a fund to make up the difference between what the employer pays and what they (reasonably) expect.

Third: make all school/yeshiva operators open their books. Parents are choking, teachers are not being paid, and rosh Yeshivas are parading in brand new SUVs and go on vacations in Florida. I want to know where the money comes from. They have an obligation to pay employees before taking profits. The amount of blood, sweat and tears they invested in the yeshiva is no excuse. If you’re a ganef, you can’t be a rosh yeshiva. (ooops, all Yeshivas would have to close…)

Fourth: unconditionally and unequivocally asser to give tzedakah to unknown individuals, or without solid proof that they are entitled to collect tzedakah. I had enough of snot-nosed hassidsh kids shaking their hands in my face asking for “hacnossas kallah” – meaning their own chassunah, coming up in four years. Yes, they do it and it is totally accepted in hassidish circles. Stupid jews fund the hassidim’s shtreimels and Escalades, thinking they do a mitzvah.

Fifth: relax your insane contraceptive rules. David Twerski, the führer of new square, prohibits any and all contraception in any and all case – yes, even if it is known the couple is genetically incompatible.

Sixth: prevent multiple small businesses to compete over one small clientele instead of uniting and opening a larger one. This is mostly due to typical Jewish factioneering.

Lastly, stop the insane price gouging in frum stores. Stop the punitive rent from frum real estate moguls, and tell shopkeepers you’ll discourage your parishioners from patronize them if they don’t sell for a fair price. I’m willing to pay pay 2%-6% more for clothing in a frum store instead of the mall. But not 10%-40%, that’s insane.

Finally – can someone tell me why all the sponsors on the bottom of the posters were from the food industry? 5 brownie points for the right answer.


© Joseph Izrael 2008

Slave To The Grind

Steg sings his second Passover Hymn, ”No More AuctionBlock For Me” at the Seder. Although feeling other peoples’ suffering is noble and praiseworthy, I believe that celebrating other peoples’ freedoms on Pessach is inappropriate. There are 358 days in the year to do that, but during Passover we celebrate our own independence and our own formation as a nation – nobody else’s.

There is, however, a far, far deeper aspect to the differences between our freedom and the blacks’ emancipation.

Redemption from physical slavery is a central theme on Pessach, but it isn’t the only one - certainly not the main one.

G-d tells Moishe Rabeinu: “Sanctify to me each firstborn in Israel”. Moishe Rabeinu goes and starts tormenting Israel with halachic minutia: for seven days now, no bread, no bagels, no pizza. Then, when you will be in the land of Israel, on this day, you will have to slay a lamb in this and this manner, and keep this holiday, and teach it to your children, and even strap these laws on your arms and your foreheads with leather strings. The parshes must be written in such and such manner, on such and such kind of parchment etc. etc. etc. Poor Jewboyz! They’ve just heard the good news that they’re finally leaving Egyptian servitude, and here comes Moshe showering them with halochos, without letting them breathe even for a second! Heck, not even a muffin before setting out to the desert? Nope. Stale hand matzos. Bada”tz shmura, with Brisker chumrahs. But how does this sanctify the Jewish firstborn (who were originally meant to serve in the Mishkan with the Leviim)?

Until then, in order to become a true ‘עבד ה one had to truly, completely and absolutely devote his entire being, inside and out, mind body and soul to G-d’s servitude to a degree of perfection, – in other words, become an Avrohom, Yitzhcok, Yaakov or Moshe. At יציאת מצרים the people united to obey one G-d, one Law – a Law that shall encompass their entire life and being, from cradle to crypt, with G-d’s hot breath in their necks forever: when they sin, they’ll incur supernatural retribution – plague, defeat and exile. When they’ll do His will, they’ll be tempted by their neighbors, and will have to withstand the arrogance and decadence that comes with power and prosperity. Every moment and passing breath will have to be dedicated to Him – what they eat, how they eat, how to sleep, to tie shoes, how to wage war and how to make peace, how and when to bring קרבנות… That’s how we became a people. That really meant that from now on, one belonging to this nation would be able to live G-d and His Law despite his sins and shortcomings.

That’s how our בכורות became קדוש we all became קדוש, and they became more קדוש. They were singled out on the day that sanctified us all, and their קדושה depends on our acceptance and observance of קדושה.

The problems begin when we lose focus, and start following Pharaoh's command: תכבד העבודה על האנשים ואל ישעו בדברי שקר. When we start enslaving ourselves to materialism, that's when our Torah becomes a שקר, and we become slaves again... Yet even so, even when mincha/maariv is but a pain and chol hamoed becomes an excuse to go to lavish hotels and amusement parks, we're still bound together -"ועוד ידו נטויה"- and need no artificial glue - durags, rap, and buggy pants ”50% off” to identify ourselves and create kinship.

A nation whose plumbers, engineers, cabbies, lawyers, chefs and schoolteachers gather after a long day’s night to learn their Law – intricate hair-splitting on oxen goring sheep, wheat adding 1/200th of growth in proximity of grapes and hilchos tumah vtaharah is a Free Nation – even if it has swindlers, concert-banning thugs and “rabbis” who cover up for child molesters.



© Joseph Izrael 2008

Sin After Sin (Israel Syndrome Pt. III)

(loosely continued from part II
includes refernces to part I)

Yossef sees his very own brothers before his eyes, after an absence of twenty-two years. Instead of jumping in their arms, he starts a seemingly cruel charade of confusion and obscurity. The most dazzling part in this familiar story, in my very humble opinion, is that the scriptures never actually tell us why Yossef had to harass his brothers at such lengths. If admission of the brothers’ guilt was the objective, it was right there after the first accusation was made. But it seems that Yossef wanted more than that.

Rashi points out that the one who found the money pouch in his pack is Levi, based on the word “the one”, referring to his being the single one remaining of a pair. It is not clear whether Rashi himself intended to hint to it, but it seems that this was no mistake; the posuk states: “ויפתח האחד את שקו לתת מספוא לחמרו במלון, וירא את כספו והוא בפי אמתחתו - And the one opened his sack to give fodder to his donkey in the inn, and he saw his money, and lo, it is in his pack’s mouth.” The verse gives a lot of seemingly unnecessary information, namely the location of the occurrence, the reason for opening the pack, and the location of the money in the pack. The last detail repeats itself when the other brothers open their own sacks at home: “והנה איש צרר כספו בשקו - …and each one’s money bag is inside his sack…” Presumably, each had to feed his donkey at one point or another on the road. Yet none found it in the mouth of his pack (אמתחת), rather inside their sacks, while emptying them. Did Yossef intentionally plan for Levi to find his moneybag on the road? Was it intended to signal them to come back to him while still not too far (not more than one donkey's "tankful" away)? And if yes, why?

In his initial encounter with the brothers, Yossef uses the word “Elokim”, in all probability not the most frequent expression in idolatrous Egypt. This sure should have lit a red light, especially after three days of captivity. Upon their second encounter Yossef acts even more weirdly – feasting with them, seating them according to their birth dates, giving them presents, and again mentioning “Elokim”. Even in Yehuda’s final argument, it seems that Yossef didn’t actually plan to ‘out’ himself at that point. Was he begging for them to recognize him? Or to admit and acknowledge something beyond their guilt in selling him?

After Yaakov’s passing, for no apparently valid reason, the brothers, suspect that Yossef still harbors ill-feelings against them, and come with a fabricated plea from their father for Yossef to forgive them. But Yossef never explicitly forgives them: he only states that he is not G-d’s representative, and that his transfer to Egypt was beyond their control.

By his peculiar antics and strange behavior, Yossef was probably trying to get his brothers to admit their initial mistake regarding their original dissent. It is possible that he tried hinting to them that their view of having status of Ovos like their forefathers was ultimately proven wrong. By singling Shimon and Levi out, he may have been trying to hint to them that just as they had judged the citizens of Shchem for their distorted ideology of agreeing to injustice (i.e. accepting Hamor’s behavior and reasoning), - so too they should renounce their own mistaken belief.

It seems that both the brothers and Yossef stuck to their initial beliefs until their deaths, and there was no definite solution to their machlokes. Yossef’s dream of a definitively united and bound nation never materialized, and he possibly held his brothers culpable for it, as it depended mostly on them.

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Note another parallel, or at least similarity, between Yaakov and Yitzchok: both blind before their passings, and in somewhat similar ways, exchange the firstborns with their juniors.

In the baker’s dream the birds freely peck at Pharaoh’s pastries, without being chased away. At the bris bein hab’sorim, Avrohom chases the buzzard (or whichever bird of prey it was) away. According to Rashi the bird symbolizes David who tries to defeat Israel’s enemies, but is prevented by Heaven from doing so. In the baker’s dream, the verse uses the word “ והעוף - the bird”; the simple meaning is just a general reference to birds, an oft-occurring expression, (although anywhere else this expression is used without a ‘heh’/”the”) yet can be interpreted as the specific bird. In our case, probably a heavenly intervention to keep Yossef from realizing his dreams the way he saw them.

--(Cont.)--


© Joseph Izrael 2007

Dreamer Deceiver (Israel Syndrome Pt. II)

(Loosely continued from here .
Generally based on the Parshas Drochim and other
commentators, with some individual seasonings)

When in a state of anger, people tend not to pay attention to details. Which is a pity; had Yossef's brothers taken the pain to listen to his words, they probably would not have misinterpreted them. In the first dream he relates them, Yossef clearly states that all of them were in the field and that the wheat sheaves bowed down to his sheaf - which clearly eliminates the hypothesis of the sheaves impersonating the brothers themselves. In the second dream, however, the brothers are clearly portrayed by the stars. Another oddity is that the first posuk stresses that Bilhah and Zilpah were Yaakov's wives. Note also how the brothers hate Yossef immediately when they notice their father's favoring him, and add hatred when he tells them about his first dream. Strangely, envy is only mentioned after he relates the second dream to his father in their presence.

In a sinister turn of events, Yossef is brought to Egypt, where he eventually reaches a status of power, yet doesn’t inform his father of his whereabouts until far later. Yaakov, according to Rashi, was punished for being away from his father so long, even though he had to leave forcibly, his life threatened, which lichorah should exempt him by law of pikuach nefesh. But no such punishment is mentioned about Yossef. Perhaps Yaakov could have avoided his father the harsh enlightenment caused by deception. Maybe there was a way to draw Yitzchok’s attention to Eisov’s true character, or to reveal him the Bechorah deal. In this case, even if Red’s wrath couldn’t be restrained, Yaakov would have been a complete oinus, and spare Yitzchok a great deal of suffering. Nevertheless, when Yossef is freed from jail, one would expect him to immediately contact his father, instead of keeping silent. Isn’t Yossef accountable for his actions?

According to one well-known theory, the brothers believed that Yossef pretended to be Yaakov's sole heir and wanted them disinherited in the same way Yishmoel and Eisov were cast aside. This pshat is usually intertwined with the idea that there was a dispute between Yossef and his brothers pertaining to their status; Yossef claimed that they were B’nai Noach, whereas the brothers believed that they had a status of B’nai Yisroel. The practical implications of the machlokes would include Yossef’s allegations against his brothers (related in midrashim and commentators) that they ate eiver min ha-chai, called Bilhah and Zilpah’s sons “slaves”, etc.
In the three sets of two dreams recurring in the different episodes of this drama, each contains one vision evolving around wheat in different phases. Yossef’s first dream perhaps tries to convey that the brothers should agree to his opinion, rather than literally bow down to him – the sheaves alluding to an achievement, the result of one’s toils, an idea developed by one. The main subject of the dispute might pertain as to their being Ovos like the patriarchs to engender twelve separate nations, or that the Ovos era is sealed and that from now on they shall bond into a single, united people. Yossef seems to believe in the latter – hence his view that they are no longer permitted to keep the Laws like the Ovos did, before Matan Torah. This is the view to which he tried to bend his brothers’ minds, but got suspicion and hatred instead. They who believed that a higher level is their lot, interpreted a brother’s opposition as a trick to become the sole heir to Yaakov. Yossef’s second dream alludes to this; the brothers, represented by the celestial bodies, striving for equality with Yaakov and his wife (absent in the first dream) will be eventually forced to bow down to him, retaining his humble, human shape.

In this entire chronicle, the baker’s is the only dream which seems to have absolutely no relevance to the story and no effect on the outcome. Yossef might understand this as a message to him: the pastries in the basket – the final stage of wheat – may represent the outcome of his belief. The baker makes no attempt to chase the birds away and save his pastries from waste, may hint him not to try to fulfill his dream and to stay idle awhile. This might be Yossef’s prevention from communicating with his family immediately upon his release.
Left in the dark, both his dreams unfulfilled, it is hard to encompass Yossef’s feelings while in Egypt. Was he wrong indeed and became the ultimate loser in this struggle? Were they indeed meant to be the forefathers of separate nations, with only him left out? Or is there still hope for a final reunion, an eternal brotherhood and national bond? Not until Pharaoh relates Yossef his second dream does he see a ray of light for his kin and himself. – Wheat again, growing from the stalk – a new beginning, maybe the seeds of salvation.

--(Cont.)--

Sad Wings Of Destiny (Israel Syndrome Pt. I)

Who could possibly fathom the anguish, hurt and agony of Yaakov Ovinu, whose entire relationship with his father is summed up by the posuk (25,28) " ויאהב יצחק את עשו כי ציד בפיו ורבקה אהבת את יעקב - Yitzchok loved Eisov for the game in his mouth and Rivka loved Yaakov*"? Leah, probably. Living her whole life in fear of becoming Eisov's lot, when Yaakov finally arrives, she is ignored and rejected. Seven years went fast for Yaakov and Rochel - but extremely slowly for Leah. When Yaakov is tricked in a way reminiscent of Yitzchok’s duping, Leah still has to live in Rochel’s shadow. During these seven years, did Yaakov exhaust all possibilities for Leah to find an honorable match, thus avoid Eisov and the pain and humiliation of being turned down, while her sister is blissfully engaged? In the absence of explicit scripture, we can only surmise that Yaakov’s acceptance of Leah as wife instead of rejecting the marriage as “mekach to’us” or otherwise, indicates that he may not be totally independent from causing his deception. At any rate, it seems that both Yaakov and Rochel accept that Leah has at least a certain degree of legitimacy to her claim of being Yaakov’s rightful spouse (30,15: “… isn’t it enough that you took my man…”, probably based on Yaakov being the rightful bechor, she therefore being his rightful wife).
Perhaps Yaakov displays a tacit admission that he may not have dealt properly with his father, yet Leah’s conduct (e.g. naming her children) indicates that he repeats a favoritism similar to that of Yitzchok, which had caused him so much suffering.

At this point Yaakov Ovinu seems to succumb to some kind of determinism, an unconditional acceptance of his fate and refusal to try to affect his destiny – this being exemplified by his scolding of Rochel and refusal to act on her behalf, as well as not intervening in the rivalry between his wives. The animosity appears to culminate with Leah, who already has four children, allowing her maidservant to bear two of Yaakov’s offspring – seemingly a rather cruel act. Not until the birth of Yossef does the narrative shift away from the two sisters’ twisted relationship – which looks to pass over as inheritance to their progeny, and set the stage for the ensuing tragic saga.

* I gave this murky translation in order for the verse to best reflect its original versatility as well as better lending itself to the various interpretations.

--(Cont.)--